Cancer was so last week....

One week ago today I went in for my full body scan.  This was the test that would tell us what stage of cancer I have and if it had spread to other areas of my body.  It was the day before Christmas eve and in order to do the scan I had to do a lovely colon prep. So they fry your insides and then make them have a party and flush everything out.  My poor innerds.

Anyway my sweet neighbor drove me up there and having nothing by mouth for a noon appointment I was a little weak as I walked into the hospital.   Exactly one week prior to this I was walking out of the same place feeling like someone just lit a fuse inside me.  Let's just say the anxiety was kicking in as I hoped and prayed the results would be good.  And I know I mentioned this before but it really is surreal.  Like I'm in a play or something and will wake up and be "myself" again.    So back to the scan...I hoist myself onto this very narrow stretcherlike bed and she asks if i'd like a blanket. Yes please! Or maybe ten! Because ever since I stopped taking my thyroid pills I have never been warm. I walk around the house with fleece pants, a sweater and scarf on!  The technician tells me to lie down and relax and I pull out my phone with my ear buds and listen to General Conference.  It was a good thing too because I had closed my eyes and was really enjoying myself when I felt the machine moving and opened my eyes and there was this flat plate inches above my nose! Seriously so close!   I hurried and closed them and had to do some quick deep breathing techniques to keep from freaking out.  And 40 min later I was done.  I sat up and walked out and went home to celebrate Christ's birth with my family, not giving another thought to the scan or what its results could bring.

After a wonderful Christmas we decided to go sledding on Friday.  We packed the kids and all their gear and went to the "bowl" in Provo.  As we arrived my cell phone rang and I told Josh it was the doctor's office,  which surprised me since his office was closed on Fridays.   So with Josh shushing the kids and me starting to panic my doctor explained that the results showed hot spots in my neck area but that was what we expected.  He then said, in his thick Indian accent, "there is nothing in your brain, lungs, or kidneys". Really? Truly? "Yes", he says.  So my stage is?
"You have stage 1 papillary carcinoma,  which the radioactive iodine will continue to kill the remaining cells that are in your neck area. I just wanted to call and tell you the good news. See you for bloodwork in 6 weeks".

Wow.  Words cannot explain the feeling I have. The gratitude for all the prayers and thoughts sent my way.  Josh and I wept with joy that I can now focus on healing and getting my strength back.

I hope I can always remember these raw feelings.  These mortal, physical, emotional pangs because they are real.  In a matter of 10 weeks I had my life change, fought a very intense battle, and lived to tell the tale.  As with all experiences I know time will blur the edges and like so many remind me I do have the good cancer and I am beginning to understand how lucky I truly am.  So goodbye cancer cells,  thanks for teaching me to value health, to hold my kids a little longer and enjoy the everyday craziness, but please don't ever come back!